Two Days...

In two days:
I will be holding him.
I will touch his little fingers that I already know.
I will smell his scent, and know he is of me, and is mine.
I will fret over his safety and comfort.
I will celebrate every poop, pee, blink, breath, and twitch.
I will be in awe of this little creature, no doubt!
I will trace his back and belly with my fingers, and hope he recognizes the pattern, and knows it's still me.
My breasts will become a source of nutrients, and be desired by a lil man like never before. heh.
My house will not be quiet. Perhaps ever again. :)
The lulling coos of Sadie snoring next to me will not be the only sounds of sleep.
Sleep may not even exist.
The laundry will never be completely done.
The kitchen may never be completely clean.
The dust bunnies may become new accessories and finally be in fashion!
My nails will start to weaken, and well groomed manicures will be a long gone thing in the past.
My hair will start to lose the thickness. (Note: I have CHERISHED the feeling of having almost 1/2 the thickness of the ponytail my beloved sister Tyia has naturally... and will continue to envy her luck of this gene forever, and will miss it dearly when my normal hair is back and I have a mere 1/8th of what she has.)
My belly will be floppy.
I will miss the little kicks and jabs and pokes and swipes of the life it once held inside.
I will miss feeling his hiccups and dancing jigs.
I will be able to sleep on my back again.
I will not have to pee every 13 minutes.
I will not have to eat every 120 minutes.
I will not have to prick my finger and monitor my sugar levels 4 times a day.
I will eat a starburst.
I will kiss his feet.
I will kiss his head.
I will kiss his belly.
I will kiss his elbows, and knees, and neck, and every little inch of him!
I will sing to him.
I will read to him.
I will rock with him.
I will cry, with tears of happiness, tears of fear, tears of sleep deprivation.
I will try, as hard as I can, to share and let someone else hold him, and know that he will be fine.
I will be sore, and will not think about it, because he will be sore too.
I will devour a brownie and drink a smoothie.

In two days, I will be a mother.
To a Son.
To my Son.
For eternity.

I will no longer be in the maternity club.
My waddle will slowly disappear.
I will be a lifelong member of the motherhood club.
I will develop eyes in the back of my head and lightning fast reflexes.
I will always sleep with one eye open and keep one ear turned in his direction.
I will learn so many new things, ways, feelings, joys, frustrations, and will grow.
I will grow every day, alongside with him.
We will walk this path together.

Will I remember what my life before him was like? I have already started to forget. He has already become my life. And I love my new life. I already love this new little life.

In two days, and I will meet the love of my life.

Two days.

Two days...

Are our bags really ready?

My bag is packed.

I think.

I keep going through it, adding more, taking more out, switching items. Switching totes. Switching totes again. Do I use a small suitcase? Do I use two small totes? Do I use the sling bag Ty brought me from Hawaii? How much is too much, and how little is too little?
A new nightgown and robe Mom and I purchased while she was here.
Socks and panties.
Nursing bras.
Lotion and toiletries.
Camera charger and extra batteries.
A sudoku book.
Aromatherapy oils and diffuser.
MP3 player loaded with sounds of nature, meditation, and reggae.
Disposable breast pads.
Pen and paper.
Hard sugar free candy.
Magazine (that Ty and Mom will wrestle over for sure!)
Burts Bees lip balm. Two of them.
Slippers (Nikki's Thanksgiving gift from a few years ago continues to get GREAT use!!!)

His bag is packed:
A receiving blanket hand crocheted by his Grandma (thanks Mom).
Two onesies.
Mittens.
A hat (with Iron On prints from the shower provided by his Auntie Samantha and decorated by his Aunt Tyia)
Baby book and Ink to capture his foot and hand prints.
Two diapers, with little cut outs to protect his sensitive umbilical cord.

Did I do this right?

I hope so...